A qualitative exploration of sociocultural influences on parenting by lying

Abstract

Parenting by lying is the practice of parents lying to influence their children’s emotions, behaviours, or beliefs (Heyman et al., 2009). While widely prevalent, most studies focus on its maladaptive consequences and rely on quantitative designs (Roza et al., 2024) overlooking nuanced motivations and factors influencing this practice. Furthermore, existing research is largely Western-centric, with limited qualitative insights from non-Western contexts. Given that cultural norms shape lying intentions and justifications (Chiang, 2014), qualitative investigation in non-Western contexts is necessary. This study uses semi-structured interviews and thematic analysis to examine how sociocultural norms in Singapore influence parents’ justifications for parenting by lying. Interviews with 19 Singaporean parents revealed five themes: authority, face, effort, intergenerational lies, and refusal to lie. Parents engaged in lies to uphold values tied to Singapore’s sociocultural landscape such as respect for authority, avoiding embarrassment, or encouraging diligence. Many also replicate lies told to them in childhood to pass on culturally valued behaviours. Findings suggest that parenting by lying is culturally contingent, reinforcing cultural values while simultaneously evolving in response to societal expectations. Given these dynamics, future research should explore cross-cultural variations to better understand how different societies navigate the moral and pragmatic dimensions of parental lying.